A Funny Follow-up to Darth Vader's Day in the News

On July 24th, Darth Vader had a big news day.  If you don't remember, check it out here first.  Here is a follow-up video to the one posted on the 24th:

Grace Fail, Bowling Win

I found this on Fail Blog, but I think it's a funny win.  Sure the bowler is probably in a lot of pain, and I'm sure he's very embarrassed, but you can't do better with pin knockdown than that.

Moscow Car-nage! More People Who Can't Drive

Most of these "accidents" are due to the complete lack of adherence to the laws of the road.  Maybe they don't have those laws over there.

Top Gear USA?

I don't know if these doofs are the right guys for the job of Top Gear USA hosts, but this video is a pretty good first view of the show.  Good luck Top Gear USA.

If I Were CEO...Google

First off, there are people who either love Google or hate them.  Some people believe Google is going to try and take over the world, stating that Google is gathering every piece of private information about us.  These people think Google is a corrupt giant that is power and information hungry, and is an unstoppable beast.  And to those people I say, "if you can't beat them, join them."

I've joined.  Google has many applications I love and use on a daily basis.  From Gmail to Google's Search engine, I use something from them every day; even multiple times every day.  In fact, the list of products I use from Google includes:
AdSense, Alerts, Analytics, Blogger, Checkout, Docs, Gmail, Google Buzz, Google Latitude, iGoogle, Mobile, Notebook, Page Creator, Picasa Web Albums, Reader, Sites, Subscribed Links, Talk, Video, Voice, Web History, Webmaster Tools, YouTube

I love Google.  I'm still not sure I'm going to continue with Apple for my cell phone.  I may still switch to an Android phone, if AT&T ever adds a decent one.  I think the format of Gmail's conversation is so convenient for following a specific line of emails.  I love Blogger.  I love YouTube.  I love free services.  But this is an article about what I would do if I were CEO of Google.  This isn't about the insane amount of services I utilize for free. This is about what I would change.  So here we go...

If I were CEO of Google, I would start with creating a unified page for users to access all the different services they utilize.  There would be a centralized storage system for all the uploaded files, for ease in recalling the files and accessing them for use.  The storage capacity would continue to grow, just as Gmail's storage capacity grows, with the total available to a user based initially on the highest average used by a list of users created from the those who utilize the most the majority of Google's programs and have for the longest amount of time.  Obviously this number would be high, due to the high number of pictures, websites, and other files stored by this type of user.  I would also offer super affordable plans for expanding the amount of storage a user may want.  All this "cloud storage" would allow the user to access any and all types of files from any Internet enabled device, using web-based software to open, view, and edit these files as needed.  Documents, images, videos, music, emails, programs, etc. would all be available to the end user from their cloud storage location.  Secure access and security/protection services would be integrated with the storage of data, allowing users to easily and quickly back-up there systems whenever needed.

If I were CEO of Google, I would add to the list of free (or ad based) services already offered.  I would start with the rumored "Google Music".  I would design the program to help users organize their music and other media for use on any and all devices.  I would design a web-based version and a local version for both cloud and local storage.  I would make it intelligent, with smart playlist creation, song recognition (like Shazam), media editing capabilities, and a rating system.  User created playlists would be designed with ease in mind (drag and drop editing).  Android devices would work seamlessly with the program, but other developers and devices could be modified to work with it.  The designed program would go beyond music syncing and be more of a content syncing program, with the ability to storage any type of media on a connected device.  Music, pictures, files, etc. would all be available to the user as a list of items allowed to be synced with their devices.  I would design the music portion of the program to take a burned CD and apply track information automatically.  For CDs or tracks that do not have track information available, the song recognition software would listen to the track (or a portion) and apply the track information.  I would add listening features that would help match the decibel level of each song to eliminate the drastic changes in levels from artist to artist or era to era.

If I were CEO of Google, I would make Google Docs work more like an actual word processor, and less like a webpage.  I would look into providing an "Open Office" type of local client that saved the created/edited documents automatically to the user's Google Docs account in "the cloud".  I would have page view editing, where what is seen on the screen is very similar to how the document is actually going to print.  I would have more tools for merging, editing, drawing, designing, calculating, and image inserting simplifying the design and creation part of the document.

Customization, manipulation, and modification would all be continued themes.  Simple is better?  I think so.  And if I were CEO of Google, I would continue this way of business.  I understand that a company's success is based on it's ability to earn money.  I would continue Google's ad based business practice and provide minimally invasive ads that provided content applicable ads.  I would look into purchasing an ad based social network like Facebook, and synchronize it with auto updates similar to Google Buzz.  Ad content and exposure would increase exponentially with Google's content specific ads and the large numbers of users.  I would integrate the user's Google account and social networking account.

It is hard for me to really come up with much I would want to change or add to Google, because I already feel they are doing a lot of things correctly.  I think Google can become a location for users to store their files (whether it be music, pictures, documents, inc.), with the added benefits of file editing, use, and access from anywhere at anytime.

Dear Ford, Pick Jimmy the Gun

I'm on vacation for the next week.  This means (unless my wife makes me be social) I'll be getting some blogging off my chest.  I'm working on the next "If I was the CEO" post.  But first, taking two kids and my wife 500 miles in my car, with all our luggage and kid "stuff", made me long for an SUV.  And if you haven't followed my "More Stories" links or my Twitter updates, you've missed that I'm in love with the 2011 Ford Explorer.  This prompted my first vacation post, a letter to Ford Motor Company.  Enjoy and think good thoughts for me.

Dear Ford,

I have a small family, a small blog, but a rather large obsession with what you’ve done over the last few years.  I think my obsession started with the Five Hundred and the sedan “reinvented design” feel.  Ultimately, the Five Hundred took on the oh-so-famous “Taurus” nameplate and continued its move forward to what I consider the ultimate family sedan.  

Continuing in that form, you recently revealed the upcoming 2011 Explorer.  And from what I can see, you’ve done it again.  You’ve reinvented the SUV (I better check and see if you guys are using the term “reinvented” or something similar, so I don’t look like I’m attempting to claim ownership to it).

You’ve also impressed me with your success in a time where auto sales as a whole suffered, and even some companies made the choice to take money from the government.  You took a good look at your business model and made corrections and adjustments to avoid the need to be “bailed out.”  You’ve produced higher quality cars, listened to what customers want, and maintained a level of professionalism, honesty, and integrity in your business practices.  No misleading ads, no unclear messages about your financial situation, and no dependence on the government have all led me to my obsession with your company.

As a small time blogger, who writes about all sorts of passions, from tech to automotive and beverages to music, I’d like the opportunity to drive, rate, and write about the 2011 Ford Explorer.  I’d like the opportunity to use the Explorer to start my new series of blog posts about long term test drives.  I’ve chosen this as my first request, due to my current family size, my desire to move my blog forward into a more consistent product for my readers and because I want to do something to help spread the word about one of America’s greatest companies.

Obviously, I think of this request as a super long, long shot, but I’m on vacation this week from my normal every day job of making one of America’s greatest banks even better, so I have time to kill.  Whatever your opinion of me and my little blog, I think you are a great company, led by a great group of people, making outstanding decisions to lead your company into continued success.

Sincerely,

Jimmy the Gun